Gentlemen: Ding, Ding

Posted: October 19, 2011 by ndbohlen in Miscellaneous

Mike is a New Yorker who was raised alongside Upper East Side skyscrapers to idolize the Mets, the Knicks, and the Jets. Mike breathes the cobalt blue, the fluorescent orange, and the dark green.

Nick is a New Englander who grew up among the Vermont maple trees to worship the Red Sox, Patriots, and Celtics. Nick bleeds the navy blue, the bright red, and the shamrock green.

Opposite upbringings and separate sports teams. So what brings us together?

shared apartment. And a seething hatred of the Yankees.

A New Yorker and a New Englander, with opposing teams and ideals, now living together as roommates. And rivals.

Where the success of the Mets and the Red Sox does not have to be mutually exclusive (at least in hypothetical terms), we compete and contend and contest one another in a conference of two, composed not of teams, but of fans. Beyond the AFC East turf battles between Jets and Pats. Beyond the Eastern Division hardwood clashes between Knickerbockers and Celtics. Beyond friendship.

We both love our sports teams to a fault, blind with passion that puts us in severe depression with each loss and lifts us up with ecstatic celebration after every win. With our homes now separated by steps instead of by state, our overzealous, borderline obsessive fandom does not just implore but demands that we hope and pray and, when possible, actively sabotage each other’s rooting interests.

In doing so, by spurring our own teams to the heights of success and spurning one another’s teams to the dregs of failure, we can secure bragging rights and vindicate trash talking. With superiority as individuals, fans, sports franchises, cities, and entire regions on the line, we have no choice but to become pitted against one another in a bitter, spiteful, knock-down, drag-out fight for supremacy.

This is Roommate Rivals. Welcome.


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